I did something brave. I attempted a short video that may or may not be "editable". If it turns out... you'll be the first to know! It was a totally new experience that I've been wanting to try and finally had an external motivator- a deadline for someone. Well, not totally new, I once did a video into my computer, but never shared it. So that doesn't quite count. Yesterday I got a good buddy to push her camera button and help me through, but oh man! Hard stuff. I am in awe of so many folks on the web who put up videos of themselves as if it's as easy as pie. I'm not a super shy person, but it's fascinating to see where I have my walls, and how my insecurities play out when I'm being recorded. Still, I think it's important to push up against that edge of comfort. Stretching gives me energy, increases my self awareness and builds compassion.
Today I will be viewing dozens of clips to see if there is anything workable. Oh my. I tend not to post about things until they're completed, but feel compelled to share a little bit about this process with you. After all, it was
you I was thinking of the entire time we recorded! You definitely inspire and motivate me more than you could ever know. Thank you! Here's a little shot of the scene... for posterity's sake.
The very nature of stretching often hurts, but we're always stronger for it. Any edges you've been pushing up against? New horizons you're reaching for?
***********
note: if you had trouble viewing the Hand in Hand promo in yesterday's maya*mail here's another link to try.
Oooh, that is tough! You are talking about one of my most difficult stretches! It's amazing how hard it can be. My first video takes my husband shot and we ended up arguing. Next I banished him from the room and shot them myself, taping a photo of a friend to the camera to trick myself that I was talking to a person. Kooky, right? A trick that worked for me was to have someone on camera with me to teach. That is as easy as pie! A human to interact with, to be yourself with, side by side...not separated by the lens!
ReplyDeleteI am striving for a healthier me, and it is a constant battle, but one that I am slowly winning. I believe that unless you push yourself you will whither. Have a wonderful day.
ReplyDeleteGrowing up in a family with a father who was a priest and a mother whose work was to care for us and support him, my concept of family involved having both parents present at home almost all the time.
ReplyDeleteI married a lovely man who looked like he was going down a relaxed career path...and then. oops. all of a sudden he has a job he adores that has him travelling a lot and working 70+ hrs each week.
I love him and on top of that, he is so happy with the work he is doing that of course I am happy for him and finding ways to support him...
But it's hard. I'm pushing up against redefining how I think a family should be and spend time together. How we parent together while spending so much time apart. How to be patient. How deal with the fear of a new baby arriving in a few short months and the possibility of doing a lot of the parenting of 2 preschoolers and a newborn alone.
This may not be the kind of "stretching" you were thinking of, but it is definitely stretching me as I try to think of ways to absorb, change and adjust with some semblance of sanity and grace.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis is a message that I needed to hear this morning. My little family is about to make some big decisions that will have a huge impact on our daily lives. I'm leaning toward the option that stretches me the most and it's scary, but I think (hope) that the rewards will outweigh the discomfort.
ReplyDeleteYou're so right about it building compassion. I don't often think about the stress that this kind of positive growth can create until I am faced with it myself. A good reminder, for sure.
Oh Maya, good for you for stretching. But this is a safe place to start-we already think you're wonderful! Can't wait to see the video!
ReplyDeleteOH I know what you mean about being stretched. There are some things in our lives that are stretching us right now... plus some decisions to make on my part (please can someone else just do it for me???) but it is for the better for all of us. Thankfully I have a husband who is behind me 100% whichever decision is made (he really is such a sweetheart! I love that man dearly!!)
ReplyDeleteSo here is to stretching ourselves and being willing to being stretched! :
(oh I LOVE your work room!!)
I have never been comfortable in front of the camera. At the beginning of the year, I made the decision to take a monthly self-portrait, hoping that perhaps I would become more comfortable with myself. It hasn't been easy and it's only the second month. February almost didn't get its self-portrait but I'm glad I did.
ReplyDeleteFor some reason this morning--before I saw this post--I was thinking about how so many bloggers include videos, and how for some it's part of what they do, and for others it seems like an evolution, sort of--"you know my voice, now here's my *other* voice" if that makes sense, to kind of take the conversation to another level. Anyway, and here you are, evolving in that direction! Good luck. I'd feel awkward too but think, wasn't it not too long ago that you first shared photos on your about page? You are getting more and more comfortable; you can do this! (And I love your braids.)
ReplyDeleteI signed up for the Art House Co-op 4x6 art exchange. Nearly didn't because instead of "name" in the name field they use the word "artist," and I thought, Oh, well then. I'm not an artist.
{deep breath} I signed up anyway.
Thanks for sharing this experience with all of us. You look quite comfortable in your workroom...which is lovely! We really do need to reach out of our comfort zones more often. Cheers!
ReplyDeleteBrave you! Life is about pushing those envelopes - can't wait to see your new venture :)
ReplyDeleteGood for you! I'm certain that your video will be fantastic. I can't wait to see it. We're an easy crowd to please because we already love everything you do :).
ReplyDeleteI've had to do videos for work and the process is very challenging and uncomfortable for me too. I still haven't got used to the sound of my own voice :).
Go YOU!
ReplyDeleteMe..? I'm always pushing against the comfort zone - it's the only way to move forward. No pain, no gain and all that.
Looking forward to seeing the results of your stretch. Great photo of gorgeous you!
oh you look radiant! I see such a HUGE shift/change-you are rockin it girl ;) Your commitment shows!!!!
ReplyDeleteyou look so beautiful with braids
ReplyDeleteI remember a short video you shared once on flickr and I loved it
you have a really beautiful voice
I hate videoing too. I never know what to say, cant look straight into the camera.. gives me the heebie geebies ! and hate the sound of my deep man voice! I shudder when I hear myself on others answering machines. I dont really sound like that do I??? lol.
ReplyDeleteYOu look so young and fresh and lovely in that pic - I'm sure the video will be great!
Interesting topic to post as I've been thinking about the same subject recently too. I think, for me, I go through periods where I "stretch" or push past my boundaries, but then I need a period of rest/retreat as those new boundaries settle in to place and become part of my life. It's very cyclical for me. Good luck with yours -- I'm sure it will be as wonderful as the rest of your site!
ReplyDeleteyou said, Stretching gives me energy, increases my self awareness and builds compassion."
ReplyDeletemaya...i love this!!! i may need to link something from my blog to yours regarding this thought.
right now i'm working through a 10-day juice fast and it is making me stretch. though your process right now might be vastly different from mine, your words rang so very true.
i'm sure you rocked it in your video. so fabulously fabulous you're exploring this medium. can't wait to see results :)
p.s. though a bit shy and introverted myself, i have a keen interest in doing some sort of video exploration some day...